It's a wobbly world,
Tipsy-turvy, spinning-curvy.
Up and down's the rule
And straight is strange
So just don't go there.

Another day in the life of me - wow what a day it was too. There's this sniper running around shooting people in Maryland and VA, and so far he's shot two people way too close to home to think about. Scary as hell, lemme tell you. The guy who was shot this morning died, and he was just pumping gas at a gas station literally within walking distance of where i work. It's really scary. Everyone is afraid to go anywhere or do anything, like pump gas, walk down the street, get in their cars, etc. I'm incredibly pissed off about it too, because it seems to me the motive behind all of this is to instill fear - and it's working pretty damn well. And I hate it. We shouldn't have to be fearful to walk down the street, not in this country, not in the proximity to the nation's capital. Honestly, what does this say about what our country is coming to? Ok enough from me about this - if you live around here please be careful, and if not please pray for those of us that do....

Rachel's 21st birthday was yesterday, and her best friend Jen (Jeni) and I drove down to Newport News to celebrate with her. I had so much fun - but it's sad cause I miss Rach tons. I haven't really seen her much since I spent a week up there back in May. The party was fun fun fun, however it was interesting because Rach has this one friend who's a Nazi about drinking, and since CNU is a dry campus we couldn't drink at her party till he left - which wasn't till about midnight or so. But Rachel is in a state of perpetual drunkenness - so we had a good time. We played twister, cranium, and sat around and read insults from this funny book and deep thoughts by jack handey. I did a killer job decorating her living room though, with pretty streamers and balloons and everyone complimented me on how great it looked and FYI I'm available for Birthdays, Weddings, Baby Showers, etc... Ok so enough plugs - one of Rachel's coworkers brought over these cute mini wines and we had fun with those. Oh!!! And I had fun with the punch. We just kinda made it up with concentrate and lotsa sprite, it turned out really well mostly because we cut up a lemon, lime, orange, and kiwi and floated them in the punch bowl and it looked and tasted great (though taste always comes secondary to looks). I actually have to say that the party was the most fun before we started drinking - though that could be because a lot of people left before the alcohol came out, and when you're sober acting stupid is that much funnier. And I have to say that Jeremy is the funniest introvert ever. Oh and also I gave Rachel a condom for her birthday in this little tin from AJ (Rach says thanks!) along with an instructional booklet just in case;)
Ok I also had a good weekend because I spent 4.5 hours in the car talking to Jenn, which was totally a great time. We talked about so many things, from religion to boys to news to life to our majors to our school to money issues and so on. It was a lot of fun, because Jen's a lot like Rach, so I get some of the same reactions from her. Plus, I don't have really any idealist or rational friends (kiersey personality sorter, ask rach) and it's fun to spin philisophically once in a while, because I hardly ever do it and I'm pretty in touch with whatever letter it is that would make a person an idealist (sorry rach, I know I'm an embarrassment because I have yet to memorize both volumes of Please Understand Me). But I need to do homework and stop typing - not like anyone wants to read anymore of my rambling anyways:) Tata!!

One more thing- thanks to my parents who should be disowning me for my utter stupidity and instead somehow seem to understand.

This week was going well. I was getting sleep, it was warm, my tests were over. But then yesterday happened, and it was like all of the stress and anxiety and desolation of last week times ten million. Thank God for Lindsay, and for everyone else that has been helping me. And thank God for continually showing me over the last few hours why I really am so lucky and shouldn't let my problems, no matter how catastrophic they may seem, get me down. Thank you Katie for the card - it means a lot to me. And it's funny, how when I got up today I was looking in the mirror and thinking, can it get any worse? and then I broke my pretty purple mirror - so the answer is yes. It's a good thing I'm not superstitious.

I figured it's about time I write a happy blog (or at least attempt to) - so here goes: I'm extremely happy that my new roommate decided to go home this weekend - she still hasn't moved any of her stuff in but that's no biggie... Slightly annoying however cause I don't know when we're going to discuss the room arrangement. But I am actually kind of looking forward to moving the room around. The way it is right now there's some wasted space - and I've been thinking about it and I can see a whole bunch of new possibilities, one of which she will hopefully like. Tonight is meet the team for swimming - where the new swimmers go from house to house to house doing different drinking games - I'm not all about getting totally trashed, but I talked to the senior girls and they were cool with that. I have a guest coming over tonight and it would really suck if I were passed out or puking or incoherent - so yeah. But anyways, I finished all four of my big test this week, only think I failed one (and did I ever fail it), so I'm happy. Yeah that's all for now:)

I haven't blogged in a while cause I've been insanely busy - not like I'm not busy right not but I have ice on my shoulders and it's hard to do work when i can't realy feel most of my arm... At any rate, this weekend was one of the most insane weekends I've ever had. And I'm not even going to bother telling you what I had to do, because you know me and I'm sure you're really really sick by now of hearing how busy I make myself. Oh well. So to the question; why do you do this to yourself? Honestly, I don't really know. Some part of me feels like it's expected of me. Like I can, so I should, you know? And since I can do a lot of things (though how well I do any of them is questionable), then I just do. And I enjoy them all, but I don't know if I'd be happy without any of them. Like I was just talking to a fellow debater, and she just finished with her first tournament ever. And as she was telling me about how much fun she had, I realized how much I miss it (especially seeing my hot navy boys...). But fitting debate into my schedule right now is so beyond possible that's it's funny. And last night as I was trying not to wig about the coming week, I realized that absolutely nothing I'm doing right now is shooting me down the path I want to take in life. I think I really want to be an editor, or a journalist, or something along those lines, and I haven't done jack to realize that goal. I was thinking about how I really need to get involved with one of the publications here, and how impossible that would be unless I drop something. But what's going to go? Debate is practically gone, though I have been entertaining the idea of returning--that looks impossible. So what else? Honor Council? I can't even begin to think how good that will look on grad school and job applications. Plus I've been thinking that it would be nice to be president... Bella?? I've invested so much time and energy in that group, and the girls are my heart, and I really do want to be business manager one of these days. Swim team? I just got back into it, and i love it more than ever. I've made awesome friends, and I feel like I can accomplish a lot if I stick with it. Work? Now this is one I wouldn't mind getting out of - but I need to money and work needs me, so far there isn't anyone who could take over my Sunday job adequately, and no one wants to take over my morning job because it's too damn early. Washington Guides? I haven't really started with that yet, but it's something that I really want to do, logistics be damned. So where does all of this leave me? I didn't include social life in here, which yes, I do have, and no, I'm not willing to give up. Sigh. I need a good pair of dice I think - though I also know that I'd never be satisfied with the answer and keep tossing them into eternity......

So I haven't blogged in a while - mainly because I've been insanely busy (not like I'm Not busy right now, I'm just procrastinating). Last week was a really long week - but I had an awesome weekend so I can't complain too much. AJ is back from London, so we're hanging out tonight - but unfortunately she's leaving for school like Wednesday:( It makes me very sad - we had a really good time hanging out this summer - though we seem to have bad luck actually Going Out to have fun:) But it's all good - I'm definately going to miss her - and I can't wait till Winter Break!! Cause she'll be back, and we'll be havinga fun sleep over with all the chicas from back in the day, and plus I'll be done with my current bunch of classes. Well I really oughta do some work - ugh sometimes I wish I could be here, and go to classes, but not have any work outside of classes. I mean, a good teacher can teach what needs to be taught in class, right? (don't contradict me, I'm being rhetorical) So yeah - peace.

Ugh. This week is going to kill me. Don't be surprised if this is my last blog ever.... Ok I'll stop being morbid for one second. Seriously though - here's how my week began: Sunday night, tried to go to bed at 11:30, coudln't fall asleep till 12 (or later) because I woke up at noon. Monday morning - wokr up at 4:40AM, went to work, 7:40AM got back to school, grabbed breakfast. 8AM started on homework for the day's classes. 11AM went to first class. 12PM went to lunch with Lauren. 1PM went to Brit Lit. 2PM came back and answered emails and tried to get missed assignments from last Thursday and Friday. 2:30PM went to training room to do shoulder exercises (cause I'm gimpy). 3:15PM went to the pool for practice. 6PM went to dinner with the team. 7PM went to pick up assignment from Combs (a really long walk). 8PM went to Bella. 10:15PM got ice cream with Bella chicas (can you blame me? it was a shitty day...). 10:30PM answered phone messages and got math assignment. 10:45 PM wrote this bitchy blog - will be doing homework till12AM, will wake up at 4:40AM, will go to work, come back, go to 9:30AM meeting, 11AM class, be in class till 3:15, go to the pool, eat dinner, go to debate meeting at 7:30PM, and finally be back in room sometime around 9:30 to start on Wednesday's homework...

So please tell me that you would consider driving your car off a cliff too, that it's not only a chemical imbalance in my brain, and thank God there are no cliffs this far down the East Coast (why am I procrastinating again? Damnit!) See I would be all about the crashing into a tree thing (no driving on the wrong side of the road shit cause people can get hurt that way!) but I've had a similar expereince and believe me it wasn't any fun at all and it made a whole bunch of fire fighters laugh at me and plus I probably wouldn't die I'd jut end up in the hospital for a long time and yeah maybe then I wouldn't have to deal with anything but when I got out of the hospital life would suck even worse and I'd probably have to drop out of school for real and yeah that would blow and I think I'm going to stop know - I'm not crazy I promise I like my life just not this week ok? bye.

Hehe. That's how I feel today, and I need to share my joy with the world!!!!!!!!! Really, I'm not sure why I'm in such a good mood. I mean today was such a long long long day, with far too little time to relax. But I enjoyed my classes, I got to sit at the club carnival and talk to lots of people, which always makes me happy!!! I sat at the tables for the Honor Council, BellACappella, and debate (each for short amounts of time). And once, at the Bella table, we sang a few songs until we forgot the words and then we just laughed at ourselves. Hehe. It was also a pretty day; it was sunny and warm and there were birds and guys with no shirts on and.... hehehehe. Ok I need to stop. So am I bipolar, you ask? Um, I have yet to determine that but stay tuned....
Yeah so I apoligize for my unprecedented melancholy blog yesterday, I was just in a self-pitying mood brought on by the fact that it was sunday and that my normal sunday routine from last year is obsolete. But it's all good, cause I'm uncharictaristically happy for a monday!!! And due to my dreary mood of yesterday, I never got to tell about all the fun times that were had this weekend. First of all, Aj and I hung out every night and that was totally groovy. Second of all, I got slightly imbibed on saturday night and had a blast at a party, only to come back to campus and have one of those embarrassing scenes that make you want to not show your face the next day (which led in part to my shitty mood yesterday). But yeah, Im not going to describe that here cause I already told most people once or twice and if you REALLY wanna know then you know how to get ahold of me... Ok, so I think I need to stop now before I type any more "hehe's" . Peace!!!!!!!!!

Why is it that when the weather sucks so does my mood? These past few days I've been in really blah moods - punctuated by the occasional high point of going out at night or talking to friends - but other than that generally not-fun. Actually I have a feeling that I'm exaggerating here, and that my mood as of late has been cheery, but not today so oh well. I just hate this feeling of being cold (damn broken AC) and being alone in my room. I didn't ask for a single damnit!! I would have loved to be alone last year I suppose - but freshman year is so different in that no one knows anyone else and so everyone on the hall hangs out together, goes to meals together, and the like. I'm not inclined to be a solitary person, even though I do enjoy my alone time - I just like it to be on my terms. When I want to sit back and read a book or clean one evening, great. When I want to hang out with friends, go somewhere, or grab a bite to eat - it sucks now because it's hard to find people to do it with. Everyone that I know is good friends with their respective roommates; and so they do everything together. Minus one or two people, but in those cases the persons I know happen to be introverted so aren't all about company all the time. I've begun to really hate my hall too, because it's so close-doored. The doors don't stay open on their own, so I have no idea who lives on my floor, or even in my dorm. I leave my door open most of the time, propped, and people stop by and whatnot, but seeing as how I'm on the fourth floor I don't really get a ton of traffic. Whatever. And this not having a roommate thing sucks when I want to go to dinner. I have to im friends who live all the way accross campus and ask if they want to go eat, and they usually invite me along with them and their roommates, but I can't avoid feeling like an interloper. I suppose it's partly my own fault, I'm not the type to travel in packs, and even though I know a ton of people few of them are close enough friends for me to hang out with constantly, as I did with Lindsay last year. We always went to meals, drank hot tea together, drove around the 'burg looking for something interesting to do, and stuff like that. Finding another friend with the same qualities is impossible, and finding someone who's down with a similar close friendship is almost impossible among friends with ready-established friendships. Sigh, I realize that I'm compaining right now, but the weather sucks and plus I figured typing would help to warm up my hands slightly. I'd kind of wanted to do something tonight, but those plans appear to be shot due to the fact that I haven't heard from a certain someone all day. Whatever. I'm tired, and I'm really sick of doing homework. I think I'll go back to my hot tea and try to stay warm in this ice box that is also my room.

So the first day of classes is over, and I'm already feeling overwhelmed. So sad, considering I only had 2 classes today. But it was definately a day for news and olds. New experiences like walking all the way accross campus several times and getting my first taste of swimteam life through a though-provoking team meeting. Old experiences like lunch with Luar, and seeing all the chicas from 2nd floor Mason, and chowing down in the bistro at Seco. I have an interesting mix of classes too, some insanely hard that I'm determined to get an A in because I will, damnit, graduate with a 4.0 in major, and some pretty darn easy classes that I'm taking 'cause they're required but could prove to be fun after all (though I am not including math class in this assesment, I haven't been there yet and we all know how much lisa hates math). At any rate, this semester will prove an interesting balancing act. How well can Lisa handle 2 jobs, 5 classes, an a cappella group that seems to be falling apart at the seams, 9 swimming practices a week, debate (though whether I'll do policy or public debate has yet to be determined), Honor Council, and a killer social life that-- as a requirement --must include clubs and parties and boys? Haha. Time will only tell, so stay tuned . . .

Honestly, I'm giving it 3 weeks before my first nervous breakdown, but hey, let's be optomistic and call it 4!!!

Today was pretty emotional. Most of the uperclassmen moved in today, the rest come in tomorrow. It was happy and sad. Happy because I got to see everyone with whom I haven't spoken all Summer, or maybe just once or twice briefly on aim, and sad because I realized how mch I am going to miss Linds. Everyone knows their roommate now, and so everyone is hanging out with their roommate and suitemates; and I don't have a roomy. I know, I need to quit feeling sorry for myself, but whatever. I can't help it. It's sad. Sigh. Tonight I'm going to visit a friend though, and hopefull that will cheer me up;)

"This better bring you some good karma." Direct quote from a friend as we moved my stuff from my nice, big room with nice, big closets to a small, cramped room with small, cramped closets and an AC that seems to think warmer means colder and colder means warmer. Sigh* Nothing fits in my closet any more, being half the size of the one I've been using for the past 2 weeks. And another bad note, I may be getting an insane roommate. My building's HR informed me that there is a chick on the Women with a Voice floor in Ball Hall (all-female upperclass dorm) that feels the hall violates her religious beliefs, and that said chick may become my new roommate. Wonderful. Can my day get any better? I think not....

So I've been at school for almost a week now, without Lindsay:(, and it's been going pretty well. I love the freedom of being on my own and being able to come and go as I please, the one sucky thing is that I have no food and my meals haven't started yet, oh well. I look at is this way - I'm working on shrinking my stomach;) At any rate, Linds is coming to visit me on Monday and staying for a few days, and after that everyone else comes back, so it should be pretty cool. And then after that AJ comes back, and we'll have mad fun hitting up the MWC parties and going to DC for clubbing fun. Also, I've got to say a big THANK YOU to Jenn for keeping me sane during "Debate Hell Week." By virtue of the fact that (how many clichés can Lisa use in one sentence?) we're both slackers and can't hold our alcohol at all, we've been doing some mad crazy bonding. It's a ton of fun. We're also in a guy race, haha if you want details on that you'll have to ask, let's just say it seems we have the same taste in men lately:) allrighty that's it for now.....

I'm in such a bad mood right now. I can't even explain how angry I am and how much damage I feel like doing to my beloved school. My best friend/ intended roommate will not be coming back to school this year. My good friend Tim and his intended roommate, who were supposed to live in my hall, aren't coming back this year - all for the same fucking reason.
financial aid. I didn't get any either, but at least I have a few merit scholarships. It's going to be a really tight year. Grrrrr. I don't know what I'm going to do. I'm supposed to move in tomorrow, but my room is designated as an RA's room, and I'm not an RA. And I had so many hopes and plans for this year. I was so excited about living with Lindsay. We were going to share clothes and take trips to the fun lights at Central Park at 5am, and do fun best chica stuff. Sigh. And no more Velvet clubbing with Tim. I'm going to miss these guys soooo much. I'm soo pissed. I'm going to be alone for these first 2 weeks too, I was so looking forward to chilling with Lindsay every night. ok i can't type any more. i'm just too upset. night.

Well today was my last day of work at Curtis Park for the Summer. I think it was a pretty good summer too. A lot less drama than last year, and a good bit more money. I was kinda annoyed that I wasn't in charge, but oh well:) Can't run everything. We'll see if I work there again next summer. I would kinda like to, just because I like the people there, and I had an awesome time this summer. But we'll see, maybe I'll get a real job;) I can't wait to get back on campus. I feel so much freer then, because I come and go when I want to. Like I want to go out RIGHT NOW, but of course it's 12:30 and my rents would shit a brick. So I'm stuck here. It bites. Oh well, I need to stop complaining and cheer up. I get to see Linds again, who I have missed dearly all summer. And AJ will be home again soon so we can chill. Ahh thinking of the future.............

At any rate, I would just love to send big kisses (and bubbles cause they're cool) out to AJ, who is 3000 miles or so away right now. I miss her tons already (even though she just left this morning) because we had so much fun in the few short months that we chilled together. Work was an interesting, though tiring, experience, and going out and sitting in the art deco of Central Park is always a great way to pass a boring Fred' night. I think it is so wonderful how we were best chicas over 5 years ago, and we still managed to recreate a strong friendship despite the many changes we've both been through. After college, it's hard to find things to talk about with old friends, but not so with AJ.We had a most excellent time clubbing the other night too, there were more single guys there than I have ever seen in my entire life. It was insane. People were trying to dance with one of us (mostly AJ - hehe on the boob glitter) like every other second. It was one of those summer memories that I know I'll be thinking about in the coming months when I'm bored and sick of school and wishing it was summer again. I can't wait till AJ comes back so we can chill some more and go to a whole bunch of other clubs and go to VA Beach and just have lots of fun before she has to leave again. We've already got plans for Vegas when we turn 21 too, and right now I'm just excited about the future I guess (and I'm also insanely tired so I apologize for making absolutely no sense) and I have a feeling that the next week is going to be terrible because its my last week of work, after that I go back to school and so I'm working all week; I haven't had a full day off since last Saturday and I won't be getting one till next Monday (move-in day) subsequently after which I will be imersed in the wonderful world of debate research when you spend all day reading legal briefs and newspaper articles about treaties that really don't matter much in my little bubble of a world. OK I think that's enough for tonight. I miss you AJ! and all of my friends from school, who I will be seeing in a few short weeks!!!!!!!!

I am the imfamous elves (of the shoemaker)!

Find your fairy tale character at kelly.moranweb.com.


How is it that I am an elf? Just because I like shoes and I'm short!??! NO FAIR!!!!!!!!!!!!

I am truly passionate.

Find your soul type at kelly.moranweb.com.